rant

a rant to no one

i graduate from college in less than 20 days but the only jobs i can find in logan are as a receptionist or working in fast-food joint or grocery store, nothing in my field. isn't that ironic? i go to college so i don't have to work a mediocre job in a grocery store, but that's the only thing i can do once i graduate? i currently have a dream job teaching kids to ride horses in park city, i'd love to go full time at that job, but that would mean moving down there and that would be mean leaving my fiance.  he won't transfer schools, so if i want to stay with him i have to quit the job in park city or live without him.  i can't keep driving down there for work.  a 2 hour commute when you make $10/hr is not that great, especially in a little old '96 cavalier. have you ever tried to drive in a summit county snow storm? i've been the passenger during one and i can tell you, those things are not for the faint of heart.  this is the feminist in me: why is that it isn't expected of alex to leave school to be with me, but it's expected of me to leave my job to be with him? are my dreams not as important or worthwhile?  i feel like i am banging my head against a brick wall trying to get to the other side but surprise! there is only cement behind that brick wall- there is no other side, no getting through. fuck all of this.

homosexuality

This video makes me cry. Even though I have only ever known one gay gentleman in my life, and don't have any contact with him anymore, I am a HUGE advocate for gay-rights.

Imagine a world wherein it is just assumed that you will have a crush on, date, fall in love with, and marry someone of your same gender. That's the way your entire family is, that's the way all of your friends are, and that's the way everyone you know is, has been, and will be forever. But you don't like girls (assume you are a girl), you like guys. You have liked guys for as long as you can remember. You remember your first crush on a guy and how you were so sad to see him flirting with another guy. In all your classes you are taught about homosexual relationships and how that is the normal and right way to do things, but you just flat out don't like girls. Now that you are in college, and all of your friends are falling in love with the girl or guy of their dreams and planning their wedding and their lives, you still haven't found a guy that likes girls, and you fear that you will never find one. Even if you do, he would have to come out as a hetero to his friends, co-workers, and family. Then you two wouldn't even be allowed to marry in most states, and your relationship would be deemed "deviant". Your life with this man, should you ever find him, would be a tough one dogged by laughs, jeers, hazing, and harassment. And not just for you and your man, but also for your children if you ever have them. They would be the kids of hetero's and hetero's are weird, gross, and unnatural.

That is the world that most LBGTQ people live in and it sucks.

I don't understand how people can look at others and say, "Your type of love is wrong, and evil. My type of love is the only kind that is real and right." It makes me mad to see these lovely people pushed to suicide, or relationships with people they don't truly love. My heartbreaks for anyone who feels that they are second rate.

We tell children to not judge others by their cover, and to like people for who they are on the inside, despite their outside. Well, isn't saying, "You can't love or marry that person because their genitals are exactly like yours," doing the EXACT opposite of that statement.

I support gay rights and believe that they are some of the strongest and bravest people out there to stand up for themselves.

{ps- don't post anything derogatory or i'll block you from commenting, thanks}